If Harry Potter Met Us!
by Rusty4Coke
Summary: its not really very much about harry potter but he comes into it anyway read if u must!
1. Chapter 1

A Random story called If Harry potter met us

If me being her and her being me and her but if you where her then it would be me her being me!

This Story was written by Moonbeam and Rusty moonbeam being Keoni and Rusty being RustyofTo5 who has written stories unlike Moonbeam who hasn't.

Disclaimer: we obviously don't own Harry potter otherwise we would be living in a big mansion and we would have no idea this website exists or if we did we wouldn't read it anyway on with el storyo

(Excuse the madness please)

So me and Rusty we at a sleepover at there friends who was actually a boy who was going out with another friend Robyn but that's another story but for some reason we where at his house and he is mental on pets and has pigs, rabbits, cats and three dogs oh and budgies. The dogs shall be in the story including an extra dog called Charlie spiral our friend also has a dog called Charley but it's a boy unlike Charlie who is a girl there is also two other dogs Megan and Wolfie one is massive and one is small but anyway there we where inside Spiral house sleeping when there was a loud bang.

"What the hell!" moonbeam shouted!

"WTD?" added spiral in one of his many strange voices!

Rusty who was still half asleep and everybody new she was not a morning person "Whoever they r tell 'em i'm still sleepin!"

"Who's gonna go down stairs first?" MB sounded freaked.

"I've got an idea!" but before MB could stop spiral he had pushed Rusty down the stairs!

"WAT THE HELL!" Rusty screamed as she appeared out the sleeping bag "I told u I was asleep!" then she turned round and screamed!

"Rusty?" MB.

"Yes!"

"Was that u screaming?"

"Yes u dolt!"

"O so what's down there?"

"A freaky blonde and some whacked out doods pointing sticks at me!"

"OK then!" moonbeam looked slightly disturbed "is it safe to come down?"

"Look muggles" said a cold a voice "come down or we'll blast your friend!"

"Oh just blast her!"

"Moonbeam!" spiral looked shocked!

"I heard that!" Came Rusty's voice from downstairs sounding annoyed

Slowly Spiral descended the stairs well most of the way was slow but then he slipped on Rusty's sleeping bag causing the people to panic and kill him. Moonbeam nearly fainted but caught the banister just in time.

"Rusty what just happened?" yelled MB

"Well they pointed there sticks at spiral said a bra kadabra and he fell down the stairs and I think I think…"

"Think what?" asked MB

"His trousers fell down"

"EW!"

"Let's try not to look or panic" said Rusty

"Who da Fuck is shooting us" said MB

"Who cares fire our shit!" replied Rusty

There was a loud bang and four dogs appeared from behind the people

"Megan KILL!" yelled Rusty but Megan just sat down and ignored her

"Fine then CHARLIE KILL!" both the Charlie's sat down and stared

"WOLFIE!" there was a muffled bark from underneath Megan's arse

"Err ok never mind"

"WTF IS HAPPIN DOWN THERE"

"If I told you, you would never believe me"

HA HA CLIFFY

This was a joint work by Rusty and Moonbeam apologies to spiral that died without dignity. This is the end of this chapter so ha ha ha tune in the next time we can be bothered to type! Aster la Vista IDIOTS!


	2. Chapter 2

This is the second chapter of if Harry Potter met us if you didn't like the first chapter why the hell are you still reading?

Anyway on with the next chapter oh wait

Disclaimer: we obviously don't own Harry potter otherwise we would be living in a big mansion and we would have no idea this website exists or if we did we wouldn't read it anyway on with el storyo

"Tell me now Rusty or I will throw your coke out the window" threatened Moonbeam

"Come down there's no-one here to hurt you" came a voice

"Tell that to half naked boy over there" said Moonbeam trying hard not to look at Spiral whose superman underwear was rather sickening

"It's ok Moony this doods ok" said Rusty calling from the bottom of the stairs

"I have two things to say about that 1. The last time you trusted someone we ended up in Paris 2. DON'T CALL ME MOONY!" Said Moonbeam annoyed

"Naw we can trust this dood he has a long beard" replied Rusty standing up

"The last guy we trusted had a goatee and a sombrero but we still took the train!" said Moonbeam but she came down the stairs anyway and saw this guy had no stick pointed at them and he wasn't blond

"Now to take you somewhere safe" said the old dood taking out a stick

"WOAH ok no way not with the stick! Anyway what about Spiral is he gonna be ok?" Asked Rusty

"Spiral is dead now come with me"

And with a wave of his wand Moonbeam Rusty and a load of dogs where taken away from the house leaving Spiral his boxers, a few budgies a paper mashie head and a set of stairs.

**_line breaker I LIKE CHEESEline breaker I LIKE CHEESEline breakererr bye_**

They where taken to a moving place and by the looks of it, it was a trains cargo hold

"I LIKE CHEESE AND I SLEPT WITH PROFFESER MAGONAGOL………TWICE" yelled Dumbledore suddenly. (Okay so he didn't really say that but it's funny anyway!)

(What he did say was): "Now stay here and hagrid will pick you up" he said with a polite smile "he's hard to miss and he'll be carrying a lantern, he will also be shouting for the first years! Now are you going to be alright then?"

"Ye." Moonbeam said sarcastically "as soon as we've got over EVERYTHING!"

"All right, all right calm down now everything will be explained just don't get into trouble! Ok?"

"Ok" the girls said in unison.

"Now ill see you later" and he disappeared with a pop.

"Bye then!" Moonbeam said sounding depressed.

"You really mean Spiral is well…."

"Ye rust he's dead!"

"Cool!" Moonbeam looked slightly scared (maybe her friend was going insane because of there current situation!) "Can I pick the song we play when he's going down the ile!"

"It's a funeral not a wedding!" she wanted to hit Rusty now!

"Oh ye! Can I still do the music!" she looked like a young puppy that was about to go for a walk!

"Yes!" Moonbeam felt a bit like a mother and she was the younger one! "And all this talk of weddings makes me thick who's gonna tell Robyn?"

"Good point but we'll have to get out of this first!"

"Good point but lets just see were we're going!"

Just a little message to Bunny With Bad Acupuncture:

For your information we did use spell check so there!

This is the end of this chapter so please R&R were begging YOU!


	3. Chapter 3

This is the chapter of the three for If Harry Potter met us!

We've only had one review and they didn't even like it!

Ch3:

Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny were sitting in a carriage together.

"I wonder were Neville and Luna are?" Hermione said peering out the door.

"Does it matter?" Ron had been in a bad mood ever since they'd got on the train.

"Oh for goodness sakes Ron can't you but a little less selfish!"

Ron just looked even grumpier "It's just something's not write!"

"Oh now your turning into that old bat Trelawney!"

"Do you to ever stop arguing!" Harry had been wanting to do that for the entire of the

Train journey "

"Ye you're waking up Hedwig!" Ginny had got incredibly attached to Hedwig since her and Harry had been going out.

At the end of the Train journey our favourite heroes exited the train and soon after both Rusty and Moonbeam our favourite idiots followed.

"Now what did the dood with the beard say?" Asked Moonbeam.

"Dunno? Stay here?" Replied Rusty.

"He did ok let's stay here" said Moonbeam.

They stood there until nearly everyone was gone then Neville and Luna stepped of the train Neville was covered in Lipstick and Luna's hair was everywhere

"Err it was windy" he said before running away with Luna

"There you are" came a voice Both Turned

"Hi Tall person I thought my brother was tall" said rusty looking up for the first time!

"Er….You must be Hagrid?" enquired a rather startled Moonbeam.

"Ye that's me!" He said with a very large smile "sorry imp late I had to take the first years up and you weren't there!

"Sorry we kind got a bit lost!" she said with an embarrassed smile.

"Don't worry about it! Now come along with me!"

The two idiots and their four dogs followed suit. Hagrid led them to a lone boat on the edge of a large lake, in the centre stood a castle. It was bit like a fairy tale but only Moonbeam noticed because Rusty was killing herself watching the poor Wolfie trying to free himself from Megan's large arse!

"The poor thing" Hagrid said looking pitiful "We can fix that as soon as we get to my house!"

"Don't worry he's used to being at all the butt end of jokes!" Rusty was trying to stifle her laughter but when she said this both the (cruel unhelpful) idiots fell over laughing their heads off!

"Now you two stop laughing!" he glared down at the two of them "it's cruel to laugh at someone else's pain!"

"Were sorry." Moonbeam said trying to stifle her laughter.

"Its is our way!" said rusty sounding like Nufu(if you don't now who he his then: He's an evil ruler of a planet and he stole loads of cows and planned to blow up the planet(he also looked like tofu), luckily Beast Boy(from the Teen Titans) stopped him using hot sauce and a Moped!)

"Yes we are the Scottish hamsters!" You can probably guess what voice MB was doing!

(You guessed she sounded like a Scottish hamster! And if you didn't get it then get youre head checked!)

"I can tell you are going to be a handful!"

On the other side of the lake they were led to a small hut were as soon as they got in all five dogs started barking!

"Who's that?" Said Rusty trying to protect herself from having her leg slobbered on

"This is fang!" Hagrid rub the dogs head with his big hand "Now let's help that little

One!"

This was written while Rusty was not there! So this all thanks to me! YES me the one the only THE me! By that I mean Moonbeam!

OI! – Rusty

THE END (well of this chapter)


	4. Chapter 4

Hi Bonjour if your reading this your probably after chapter 4 of if Harry potter met us unfortunately I fell like typing this so you may have to wait a tiny while or scroll down if you wanna hurt a little persons like me's feelings This chapter is written by Rusty the last one was written by Moonbeam but we failed to mention that but now you know except for those evil people that scrolled down XP anyway this chapters going to be about robin dying cos he got killed? No wait wrong notes ah ha here it is fetch dog from grandmas! DAM BRB! XFew minutes laterX he he the dogs here old note ah now this is the right one! MUHA YOU HAVE TO READ AND FIND OUT ah well that's an interesting note yet still it gives me no clue what to write…

ANYWAY ON WITH EL STORYO

Disclaimer: ive wasted enough of your time already if I do own it I would be in a swimming pool with a floating laptop and a cold glass a cola!

Chapter 4

"Explain again why I need to do this?" asked Moonbeam who was holding Megan's arse open with a pair of tongs

"Because I need to get my hands in!" said Hagrid the third time then bending down he began to pull wolfy out when

"Ew he's feeling her arse!" said Rusty and both fell about laughing while Hagrid stared on annoyed

Then suddenly there was a knock on the door. Hagrid groaned and just to get some peace and quiet for five minutes he knocked the two out and shoved them outside on the pumpkin patch along with the four dogs then went to open the door.

"Harry, Ron, Hermione! Come in come in av a cuppa!" said Hagrid showing them in

"Hi Hagrid how's your holiday been?" asked Hermione sitting down on the chair nearest the table so she could lean against it Harry and Ron went round the table to the other side.

"Nothing overly exciting" said Hagrid thinking of the two insane people parked in his pumpkin patch

"Oh Dumbledore said at the feast that you might have some trouble on your hands?" said Hermione straightening up

"Err yea" and using his really fast thinking brain Hagrid grabbed Megan from outside and put her next to fang

"Its fangs girlfriend err yea fangs girlfriend yea fangs girlfriend!" exclaimed Hagrid

"Err are you alright Hagrid I mean you said that 3 times?" asked Ron looking at Megan sideways

"Err yea just a shock see" explained Hagrid wiping sweat of his brow at the exact same time as a rat

But not any rat a filthy keniving shitty rat. Well how Harry would describe him anyway

"Ooooooohhhh master be so pleased I found them yes they are my precious rings... No wait I mean prisoners yes prisoners!" Muttered wormtail as he was dragging the two across the naked forest? No wait it's called dark forest? I don't remember it's the naked forest now!

After awhile of being dragged over rocks and twigs our two mental patients finally woke up realising they where being dragged by there shoes (very east to deduct as there shoes where slowly falling of)

Nodding to each other they grabbed the nearest load of branches and attached them to there shoelaces and slowly very slowly so slowly in fact that well I dunno anyway there where free to do what they wanted. Well not really they where stuck in the middle of the naked forest alone but definitely not naked unless you count the loss of a shoe.

"Ok where here in what ever this place is! With a freak that sounds like Gollum and god knows what else!" said Rusty looking like a flamingo on one leg

"Err calm down we will get outta here yea calm down RUSTY CALM DOWN" shouted Moonbeam shaking Rusty

"What's up with you?" asked Rusty hopping away

"I dunno I just don't like naked trees!" said Moonbeam looking round and wringing her hands

"Ok…Because that's not strange!" said Rusty also looking around then out of the corner of her eye noticed something

"Hey what's that?" Asked Rusty pointing it out to Moonbeam

"A deer on Drugs?" replied Moonbeam shrugging

"No I think it's a senator?" said Rusty then both looked at each other and collapsed laughing

(Its meant to say senator by the way you know the people!)

"Why be you inferior beings laughing about?" asked one that had appeared suddenly behind them

Both looked at him then burst out laughing again

"I said explain your selves!" he yelled as the herd advanced on them

"We—would---but---gotta---run!" gasped Moonbeam between giggles and both of them ran The Centaurs close behind

Running as fast as they could they ran round trees, logs, blue cars and the occasional dark lord WAIT DARK LORD!

Rusty and Moonbeam braked hard and stopped

"Err Hi we just gotta do this!" and with one swift Kick Malfoy was in extreme pain

"Goodbye" they both said in unison and ran closely followed but some Centaurs a couple of Minions and a Possum

Still running and straying ahead by about 4 meters glancing behind them quickly they turned back and hit something hard and pink

Looking up slowly they saw that it was a giant's leg

"Err hi?" said both well aware that 4 wands and god knows how many arrows where pointed at them

Grunting the massive giant bent down and picked up the two and lobbed them away

"Where blasting of Again!" yelled Rusty

"Wrong show Rusty" said Moonbeam

"Now I knew that but…" SAMSH BANG WALLOP

And with a spectacular entrance of smashing though the window behind the staff table and landing in someone's dinner

"Err Moonbeam?" asked Rusty not moving just sprawled on the table

"Yea" replied Moonbeam also sprawled with her head in mashed potato

"I have glass in my arse"

"The world really wanted to know that"

Throughout there conversation the great hall was silent until professor McGonagall got up from the staff table and walked towards them

"Are you alright?" there was a silence until both sat up at exactly the same time and pointed at Professor McGonagall

"POKE!"

"What sorry?"

"POKE" and moving forwards they poked her then began chasing her round the great hall. Until

"Proccifficus Totalis!" chanted Hermione and Moonbeam fell backwards onto the floor

Rusty now acting like some sort of gorilla ran down the Gryffindor table then sat down on a pudding right in front of Hermione

"You BI-OTCH!" yelled Rusty right in her ear and turning round and picking up the cake began throwing it at her

"Hey what?" was all Hermione could manage before her mouth was full of cake. When Rusty had finished she looked like the cake and then finishing it of added a cherry to the top.

Ron who was behind her went to hit her but Rusty turned around and showed him the ready handful of jelly. Ron sat down again hurriedly

Then a shout from across the hall

"Oi weasel I should change your name Chicken would be more suitable!" then with skill Moonbeam who had been unfrozen by a nice Hufflepuff grabbed a handful of lemon blamonge and with deadly accuracy hit him straight on the forehead

Ok Moonbeams turn next!

BUTTON POKE IT WITH URE MOUSE!

V

V

V

V

V

V

V


	5. Chapter 5

If Harry Potter Met Us

Chapter 5

Disclaimer: as I have said in each chapter I don not own harry potter if I did my name would be JK Rowling which for reference its not its Rusty Moo (yes laugh is used to it)

This chapter is written by Rusty cos she's on a roll pple WOOOOO

ANYWAYS BORING STUFF

Disclaimer: if I owned Harry Potter he would be doing my slave work muhahahaha oh and the dry cleaning

NOW GOOD STUFF

Malfoy gasped as some of it fell into his massive mouth

"Ha bull's-eye!" yelled Moonbeam doing a dance on the table

"Woooo!" yelled Rusty joining her on the table also doing a jig and then randomly the Hamster Dance came on!

"BE QUIET!" yelled Dumbledore a vein on his temple standing out

"Err" said Moonbeam and Rusty as the music stopped "NO!" and the music started up again and so did that bad dancing then everything went black

HOSPITAL THINGY

"Rust? Rust?" asked Moonbeam barley awake then she heard small speaker noise and groaned

"Where the hell am I?" asked Moonbeam opening her eyes and sitting up

"Hospital wing dearie" said a small lady

"Hmm ok do you like pie?" asked Moonbeam

"Not really no" said the nurse avoiding Moonbeams eyes

"Hmm I like pie pie is pie like pie is made of pie and there is a pie!" SPLAT

"IN YOUR FACE! HA HA!" yelled Moonbeam throwing a pie right into her face. The nurse screamed and ran away to clean her face while Moonbeam laughed then after awhile she stopped and looked round

It was a large…AH WHAT THE HELL YA SAW THE MOVIE

Anyway

Moonbeams eyes fell on Rusty who looked to be asleep but Moonbeam knew otherwise as she could see some of the wire leading to her ears

Moonbeam walked forwards and poked Rusty hard in the arm who flinched. Taking out an ear Rusty said

"What Moonbeam this was the good part!" said Rusty obviously pissed

"Then Pause it you idiot!" replied Moonbeam equally pissed

"Uh the pause button broke remember!" said Rusty literally radiating pissed waves

FALSHBACK

"RUSTY RUSTY HELLO!" yelled Moonbeam right next to rusty but she did not flinch

"Dam the iriver again!" complained Moonbeam doing a jig behind her back then waving a hand in front of her face. Rusty tuned around but did not take an ear out

"What?" she asked

"Take the ear out!" said Moonbeam pulling at it and eventually it came loose

"What that was a good bit!" complained Rusty attempting to put the ear back in but Moonbeam held it firm

"Then pause it!"

"No!"

"Fine then I will!" and a struggle ensued eventually Moonbeam had pushed the button marked Pause only problem was she pushed it to hard

END FLASHBACK….

"Ok maybe I did but we gotta get outta here!" said Moonbeam shoving away the big bubble that was the flashback

"But why the atmosphere here seems to be charging my iriver and the beds are comfy!" said Rusty pouting

Moonbeam thought for a sec then it came to her In a big light bulb

"Yea but where's the coke?" she said slyly

"Right lets get outta here!" said Rusty

Well I should end here but I can't be bothered so you're stuck with me!

Ha ha

Moonbeam and Rusty where on the run they had managed to get out the hospital place with out being seen but there was a lot of people heading past the cupboard they had hidden in

"Why are we in a cupboard again?" asked Rusty

"Because we are! And will you turn that iriver down!" complained Moonbeam in whispers "I can hear it from here!"

"That's because you're right next to my ear!" said Rusty though gritted teeth

"So I am!" then Moonbeam stuck her head out "All clear!" she said and stepped out

"Phew thank god it's horrible in that cupboard!" Said Rusty

"THE IDIOTS HAVE ESCAPED SOMEONE HELP!" came a yell from up the corridor

"RUN!" both yelled and they headed for the stairs

On the way down Rusty got her foot stuck in one of those horrible starirs

"Noooo Rusty!" yelled Moonbeam all dramatic

"Go on without me ille be ok!" yelled Rusty equally dramatic

"Why the hell are we acting like there in a romance movie!" said Moonbeam in the same tone

"I have no idea!" replied Rusty also using the same tone

"Just leave ya shoe" said Moonbeam talking normally

"Yea ok" and with a small tug her foot was free leaving the Shoe for the hungry step even though it never ate it as a moment after the two had left Malfoy came down the steps

"Oh I will search high and low for the damsel that fits this beautiful…"

"Trainer?" interrupted Goyle

"No goyle a shoe a shoe my word this girl must be beautiful to wear such a…"

"Trainer?" interrupted Crabbe

"No crabbe a shoe see a shoe a shoe a… My word it is a trainer!" he exclaimed

"Shoe" said Both crabbe and goyle at the same time

"AHHHH!" Malfoy screamed

THE END OF A CHAPTER HOPE YOU ENJOYED

The next chapter will deffinetly be written by Moonbeam cosi will force her :D

Good Mornin Scotland!


	6. Chapter 6

If Harry Potter met us? CHP.6!

**Disclaimer- I do not own Harry Potter! Me and rusty have already stated that if we did hed be doing our landry!**

Our two heroes were running along one of the stone corridors, well one was hoboling.

"I want my trainer back!" Rusty moans.

"SHUT UP!" screamed moonbeam "I don't care about your trainer!"

"Well I care about it!"

"Then you can have a funeral for it!" then moonbeam crashed into a wall… "FUCKIN STONE THINGY!"

"That's a wall" said a ghostly figger of a boy, hovering above them…wearing superman underwear.

"Spiral!?!" shouted rusty

"EEEEEWWWWWWWWWW" shouted MB.

"I have a bone to pick with you!" exclaimed the deciest spiral

"But u don't got no bones" Rusty pointed out unsimpithetically.

"THAT'S NO THE POINT…" screamed spiral, then he siged

"Calm down and tell us the dam problem! Were being chased here!"

"YOU LET ME DIE WITHOUT AN DIGNITY!" Wailed Spiral

"SHUT UP!" screamed a female voice coming form a girls bathrooms.

"Shove off moany! Anyway its not our fault u were wearing that underwear when you died" MB

"How was I suppost to know I would die!"

"How the hell should I know!"

"Look you could have pulled my trousers back up!"

"Fuck no!"

"LOOK WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST GO COMANDO!" screamed rusty…then she realised what she said

MB gave her a look meaning 'You are a freak! What the fuck is your problem!'

"Alright well ignore what rusty just said" MB said turning back to spiral.

"Look I had nothing else!"

"You coulda worn a thing?" pointed out rusty…

MB cringes then collapses.

"Shit!" commented rusty.

Then came shouting from up the corridor. "Double shit!"

Yo tis Keonie! I made this chapter! Sorry its been so long but me and rusty4coke got into a website wich we LOVE sooooo much! PI! It completely rocks!...Anyway im sorry its short and late and it probs suck but review anyway!


	7. Chapter 7

Ello faithful reader...

Wait faithful.. you must be if you waited 9 months for 6th chapter!

Disclaimer: we don't own HP if we did well things would be a little different...

Harry Potter Chapter 7

"RUUUUNNN!" yelled Moonbeam and turned and went to jump out the window but spiral grabbed her and pulled her back

"You let me die without dignity! You aint going no-where!" he exclaimed Spiral then he turned and yelled outside

"There in here!" then he turned back to the two but they had gone.

After searching for awhile he found no one so when the search party busted in he had a lot of explaining to do...

Meanwhile under the grounds of the castle

"Wow this place is huge! And i liked the slide! That was coooool!" exclaimed rusty bouncing up and down like an idiot on a pogo stick

"Yea your lucky I read the book mate! This is the chamber of secrets!" grinned moonbeam

"The chamber of le whata?" asked Rusty stopping bouncing

"SECRETS!" yelled moonbeam the echo of her voice kept bouncing round

"jees mate you didn't have to say it so many times!" said Rusty covering her ears

"what!?! I didn't... i give up" said moonbeam and closing her eyes and walking straight into a wall.

"hehehehehe" laughed Rusty and that also echoed around

"HA FOUND THEM!" came a booming voice and rusty nearly jumped out of her skin and then ran for it moonbeam close behind

Running as fast as they could the eventually manged to squeeze down an incredibly small hole

"when can we get out here?" asked rusty

"wh-en-dcho-gets-your-dose" replied moonbeam

"eh?" asked rusty moving her arm

"WHEN YOU MOVE YOUR..oh" replied moonbeam

"so when? i am suffering from coke loss here!" said rusty shivering

"yea and I'm suffering from rust exposure!" complained moonbeam

"theres rust here?.. wait HEY!" yelled rusty and elbowed moonbeam

"shhh they might still be here!"

"somehow I don't think so" replied MB

"why not?"

"it stinks!"

"...Sorry"

And that was enough for MB she shot out of the hole like her ass was on fire

"you nasty little stinkin...!"

"AHEM!" interrupted a voice from behind


End file.
